Husband-wife communication about finances
Marriage is like the partnership of the left and right hands of the same person: they are perfectly matched but totally opposite. One hand working alone will not accomplish half as much as two. Many tasks are impossible without two hands working together.
Unfortunately, in any relationship a balance is hard to reach. Usually one personality will overwhelm the other, and a marriage will take on a one-sided tilt. The lack of training in finances in a marriage is bad enough, but combined with little or no communication, it can be disastrous.
Turning financial trouble around
The first step is to recognize that being different is not being inferior. God put different gifts and abilities in the marriage, and it takes two people working as one to succeed in the home. Since men often are guilty of excluding their wives from financial decisions, a concerted effort must be made to use their gifts and abilities as counselors. Honesty between partners is an absolute necessity. Almost anyone can handle a situation if he or she knows about it and is a part of the planning.
Get help
If the problems and the communication gap are very intense, most couples will need outside help to get on the right track. Seeking counsel for marriage or financial problems should be as normal as seeking medical counsel. God has established various gifts and abilities throughout His kingdom, and unless couples are free to use them, someone's ministry goes wanting. "Without consultation, plans are frustrated, but with many counselors they succeed" (Proverbs 15:22).
Set specific goals
In order to establish the right relationship about finances in the home, husband and wife together must establish specific goals. Obviously, the first must be to solve financial problems if there are any. Any couple that has not done so previously should plan a weekend together (alone) when every aspect of the family’s finances can be discussed and some specific goals agreed on. Remember that any financial planning involves two people, seeking mutually compatible goals under the umbrella of God’s plan for their lives. Two people operating as one with unity of mind will find God’s plan. "I love those who love me; and those who diligently seek me will find me" (Proverbs 8:17).
Quite often a reasonable compromise will be necessary when establishing goals. One may be more committed to giving than the other; a home may be more important to one; a bass boat may seem like a basic necessity to the other. The first and most important aspect is to discern God’s overall plan and then adjust as necessary to make it work.
Conclusion
Communication and planning are the keys to success. It’s a matter of determining where you are (financially), having a plan that is fair to both, and talking about it (regularly and calmly). "With all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing forbearance to one another in love" (Ephesians 4:2).
